July 1, 2009, I made a decision: I was going to run a marathon. 26.2 miles, a full marathon! I felt I was missing some type of huge physical accomplishment. The date of the run- April 24th, the OKC Memorial Marathon. I had 10 months to train. There were a few problems though. I had asthma as a child, and anyone who has asthma knows, it doesn't go away. I learned that the hard way day 1 of my training. I ran a measly 2 blocks and barely made it back up the stairs to my apartment. Day 2 I reminded myself why I was doing this, and made it to a mile. Progressively I saw improvement over the next 4 weeks, but then I platoed for a month and a half, and could not get past 4 miles. I tried everything, but never could push myself hard enough. I called my dad one day, because he is a professional cyclist, and asked for advice. He informed me it is completely a mental block, but he would not give any advice past that. He told me I have to take control of my mind. I didn't run for the next 3 days, and began contemplating. I realized I had to take control and just stop listening to when my mind said to quit. I immediately left my apartment. After 3 miles, my body and mind tried to quit. I even sat down, but then I remembered that I just needed to shut it off. I ran for another 4.5 miles that day. Over the next 3 months, I got to where I would run on average about 10-12 miles every other day. December 12th, I broke up with my girlfriend, and was in need of a good run. I went to the track I ran on, and told myself "Do it all." My goal for the day 18 miles. I was just fine until around mile 14. My left hamstring really started hurting, but I pushed through it. I made it to 16 miles and then collapsed. I couldn't get up; I couldn't do anything. I couldn't even walk back to my apartment. I felt useless. Lying helpless, my roommate came and picked me up and literally had to carry me to his car. I went to the doctor the next day. Hamstring pull. He gave me crutches to help me walk. I should have used those crutches like I was supposed to. I had to abandon my training. I went to the marathon last month, but simply as a spectator. I stood at mile 16.
Running taught me a lot. Our mind does try to trick us, but sometimes it's ok to quit.
Monday, May 10, 2010
Getting inked
Everyone lives for those defining moments in their life. We make decisions that impact how we view life for the entire future. Mine was getting my first tattoo. I decided to get it right after I turned 18. It was my way of telling myself "you're in control now." It was a symbol of adulthood, and I knew it. The idea of getting a tattoo turns many people off, but it was just right for me. Ever since getting it, I have always had the mindset of control. It made me a more balanced person. I no longer am dependent on a parent of any type, and I give credit to Mark at Hall of Tattoos. Thanks Mark. Anyone have a similar experience?
Coffee works magic
While sitting at Starbucks, I've discovered one thing: pride. Not only in myself, but in the academic work I have put out. 99% of the time every paper I wrote was put together last minute, yet I still thoroughly enjoy rereading my previous works. While reading, I am reminded why I came to such a prestigious university. I did not come here for the Greek life, or the athletic program. I came here because I fell in love with the academic body. I feel challenged, and I actually have become engaged in my work! I'm going to use my assignments from my English class as an example.
First assignment-Commercial analysis (Blog format)
I wrote my blog over Dodge's attempt to take advantage of the male need for masculinity. As a Psychology major, I actually became interested in this assignment. In high school, papers were 5 paragraphs, topic sentence, blah blah blah. Here the paper was my personal theories. It actually required a deep amount of personal touch. I wasn't given a framework and I was just filling in the blanks. I was able to let it take whatever shape I like. Just in formatting, I was able to be more expressive
Second assignment-Technological assessment
See previous blog
Third Assignment-Rogerian argument
I wrote this paper over vehicles impact on the environment, but it was written in a format I had never heard of. I was to address both sides of the argument. Being able to sympasize with the opposition is a characteristic of maturity. I also enjoyed writing this paper because I was able to propose rational solutions in the middle and did not have to pick one side (and I got to talk more about cars!). I felt this was the most actually complete paper I have written. I didn't feel that any sides of my arguement were missing, and there was no weak points in the essay. I know I will use the Rogerian format very often in my papers
Final assignment-Website
We were assigned the project of forming a group and compiling all of our work in the class into a website. No rules were really placed. Some groups I noticed simply listed their compiled work and attempted to describe the writing process. I believe we might have taken a completely different path. We made a website that was a resource for better sustainable decisions. I really got into this assignment, but sadly I felt this assignment was rushed and there could have been more work put into the final assignment.
Let's talk ethos!
My papers are all ethos, because they are all me. My topic choice was very personal. I tried to not say it everywhere, but if we only have one true love in life, then I guess I'm destined to be alone because I love CARS! Being able to write about cars in 3 of my assignments made it much more fun. Also, I went a different route and discussed intimacy on one paper which is also big to me. I depend on personal relationships with friends. All together I am very proud of my academic work. I felt this semester I was able to put more depth in my assignments than ever before, but sadly I was not able to effectively communicate my point. I feel that is something that will improve with time to come, and I am excited for what the future has in hand!
First assignment-Commercial analysis (Blog format)
I wrote my blog over Dodge's attempt to take advantage of the male need for masculinity. As a Psychology major, I actually became interested in this assignment. In high school, papers were 5 paragraphs, topic sentence, blah blah blah. Here the paper was my personal theories. It actually required a deep amount of personal touch. I wasn't given a framework and I was just filling in the blanks. I was able to let it take whatever shape I like. Just in formatting, I was able to be more expressive
Second assignment-Technological assessment
See previous blog
Third Assignment-Rogerian argument
I wrote this paper over vehicles impact on the environment, but it was written in a format I had never heard of. I was to address both sides of the argument. Being able to sympasize with the opposition is a characteristic of maturity. I also enjoyed writing this paper because I was able to propose rational solutions in the middle and did not have to pick one side (and I got to talk more about cars!). I felt this was the most actually complete paper I have written. I didn't feel that any sides of my arguement were missing, and there was no weak points in the essay. I know I will use the Rogerian format very often in my papers
Final assignment-Website
We were assigned the project of forming a group and compiling all of our work in the class into a website. No rules were really placed. Some groups I noticed simply listed their compiled work and attempted to describe the writing process. I believe we might have taken a completely different path. We made a website that was a resource for better sustainable decisions. I really got into this assignment, but sadly I felt this assignment was rushed and there could have been more work put into the final assignment.
Let's talk ethos!
My papers are all ethos, because they are all me. My topic choice was very personal. I tried to not say it everywhere, but if we only have one true love in life, then I guess I'm destined to be alone because I love CARS! Being able to write about cars in 3 of my assignments made it much more fun. Also, I went a different route and discussed intimacy on one paper which is also big to me. I depend on personal relationships with friends. All together I am very proud of my academic work. I felt this semester I was able to put more depth in my assignments than ever before, but sadly I was not able to effectively communicate my point. I feel that is something that will improve with time to come, and I am excited for what the future has in hand!
Saturday, May 8, 2010
My mistake
I found I made a huge mistake. I attempted to write a paper over intimacy and communication. I now realize it is impossible to actually really understand intimacy from a piece of paper. Intimacy is something personal on every level. Without a personal connection, it is quite impossible to truly convey your point. I should have presented my point. I feel with visual cues I would have actually been able to discuss intimacy on a deep level. Intimacy is a wonderful emotion that is very easy to understand, but it needs to be personal to describe. I do not feel I was any where near being on the academic level able to truly put intimacy in words, and I am not sure anyone is! I wish I was able to instead of write a paper, I was able to record a video message. So much more could go into that, just with having the visual of facial images.
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